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How Life’s Storms Teach Us to Dance in the Rain

Updated: Feb 26



Midlife isn’t what they told us it would be. It’s not a crisis (unless you count the occasional urge to reorganize all your kitchen cabinets at 2 a.m.). It’s more like slipping on a pair of glasses you didn’t know you needed—suddenly, the big stuff feels manageable, and the little stuff? It shines.

Here’s the thing: By now, we’ve all faced something. Maybe it was losing someone we loved too soon, navigating a health scare that rewired our priorities, or picking up the pieces after a divorce or job loss. These aren’t just “hard times”—they’re the fire that forged our resilience. Resilience isn’t about being unbreakable. It’s about learning how to bend so you don’t lose yourself in the storm.


Personally, grief has been an unwelcome companion these past few years. Losing loved ones—especially my brother—felt like the ground beneath me turned to sand. The pain doesn't get better, a reminder of how fiercely love and loss are tangled. But in that raw emptiness, something shifted. His death ripped open my blinders to the truth I’d always known but never felt: Time is not a promise—it’s a gift. Now, I cling to moments like they’re lifelines. A facetime with my parents, a hug from my son, a laugh with my husband, a get together with my family even the mundane act of stirring oatmeal on a quiet morning—these are the things I don’t just do anymore, I savor them. Grief rewired me. Challenges that once felt insurmountable now meet a quieter strength, one that whispers, “You’ve survived worse.” Yet, there’s a shadow too: a newfound fear of sickness, of time running out too soon. But here’s what I’m learning: Fear doesn’t have to steal the joy of now. So I brew a cup of tea, steep in the moment, and make a silent vow to live—truly live—in honor of the love I lost, and the life I still get to hold.


Grief is a journey no one should walk alone, and while there’s no “right” way to heal, these resources can offer comfort, connection, and practical tools. Here are a few I’ve found helpful (or others have shared with me):

1. For When You Need a Guide

  • 📖 It’s OK That You’re Not OK by Megan Devine: A compassionate, no-BS book that validates grief as a natural response to loss, not a problem to “fix.”

  • 🌿 The Grief Recovery Handbook by John W. James & Russell Friedman: Actionable steps to process unresolved emotions.

2. For When You Need to Feel Less Alone

  • 🕯️ Grief.com: David Kessler’s site (a grief expert who worked with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross) offers articles, podcasts, and virtual support groups.

  • Option B: Sheryl Sandberg’s platform shares stories and tools for resilience after loss.

3. For When Words Fail

  • 🎨 Art Therapy: Try simple creative practices—sketching, collaging, or even coloring apps like Happy Color. Grief lives in the body; sometimes art helps it speak.

  • 🌱 Nature as Therapy: Walk barefoot in grass, plant something (even a $5 grocery-store basil), or sit under a tree. Nature doesn’t rush healing—it just is.

4. For When You Need Immediate Support

  • 📞 Crisis Text Line: Text “HOME” to 741741 (U.S./Canada) for free, 24/7 support.

  • ☎️ National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call 988 (U.S.) for compassionate crisis care.

5. For When You’re Ready to Breathe Again

  • 🍵 Tea + Mindfulness Rituals: Try a “grief tea” practice—brew a cup, hold it close, and let the steam remind you to breathe. (Peppermint or chamomile are soothing starters.)

  • 🧘 Calm or Headspace: Short meditations for grief, sleep, or just being.

6. For When You Want to Honor Your Person

  • 🕊️ Create a Memory Jar: Write down moments you shared (funny, tender, mundane) on slips of paper. Pull one out when you need to feel close to them.

  • 📝 Legacy Projects: Cook their favorite meal, donate to a cause they cared about, or write them a letter (even if it stays unsent).


Grief isn’t linear, and there’s no timeline for “moving on.” Some days, just getting out of bed is enough. Other days, you might feel ready to laugh again—and that’s okay. Lean into what feels nourishing, even if it’s messy. And if you’re feeling stuck, please reach out to a therapist specializing in grief (Psychology Today’s directory is a great start).

You’re not alone. 💛


If all else fails, try this: Step outside, look up at the sky, and whisper, “This one’s for you.” Sometimes, the simplest acts bridge the distance.

Miss you Danny


 
 
 

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